Dopplebanger by Heather Orgeron

​ROMANTIC COMEDY

Publication date: 05/01/2018
Kindle Unlimited: Yes
Cliffhanger: I dunno

I did a stupid thing. It’s a stupid thing I’ve done before, and I’ve told myself that I’d never do it again, but...yeah, here we are.

I bought the book because the guy on the cover looks a little Chris Hemsworth, OK? I can’t help it! I adore Chris Hemsworth. He’s gorgeous, he’s funny, and there’s always pictures out there of him being a great dad. He’s perfect in every way. Sadly, the hero in this book, Jeff, is no Chris Hemsworth. Not even close.

First of all, let’s talk about the title of this book. What’s with all the “provocative” titles in romance these days? Does everything have to have sex right there in the title? I’m all for sex in my romance novels, but Jesus, things are just getting a little obvious lately. Can’t we be at all coy?

Now, for my OTHER problems with the book:

• I’m all for a sexually liberated heroine who goes after what she wants, but Gina was a little bit too aggressive even for my liking. I’m not going to slut shame (ever), but if she was a real person, I’d have serious concerns for her safety. It’s a dangerous world. You can’t just bang tons of complete strangers these days and expect to stay safe (and STD free) for long. And when two people who claim to bang whoever they want whenever they want and never “catch feelings” decide to bang without a condom? I get icked out. Very, very icked out. There’s WAY worse things to catch than feelings, folks.​
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• Jeff is a judgemental prick. There’s no way around it. He’s a stick-up-butt, boring, rude asshat. The only thing he has going for him is his “wondercock”, and the fact that he actually refers to his penis as his “wondercock” (I’m not even making that up. I wish I was) only makes me hate him even more.
• There are no “kids’ clubs” that are open from 10pm to midnight. So while it’s convenient that Jeff and Gina can drop the kids off at this mystery club at all hours of the night, it’s certainly far from realistic and had my bullshit meter going off like crazy.
• The comedy isn’t smart comedy. It’s silly and/or gross, slapstick fare. There’s the time the heroine vomits with her mouth full of, um, something very sensitive that belongs to the hero (spoiler alert: it’s his penis), then there’s the time a dolphin attempts to rape the hero (again, not even making that up, though I SERIOUSLY wish I was), then there’s the time the heroine pees her pants in front of everyone...yeah, that shit’s only funny if you’re a 10-year-old boy. (I should know. I have the sense of humor of a 12-year-old boy, and the comedy in this book was WAY beneath me, which is sad, especially since I still giggle hysterically at fart jokes.)
• There’s nothing remotely sexy or romantic about the sex scenes. It’s just a lot of pounding and banging. It reads like it was rejected material from some dude’s letter to Penthouse.
• Jeff calls his daughter, Evangeline, Vange. This could just be me, but that nickname is dangerously close to “Vag”, which made me do a double-take every time I saw it on the page.

All that was enough to make me DNF. I’m sure Gina and Jeff got that crap together at some point. I just didn’t care enough to stick around to read about it.

But to the cover dude, I say, nicely done, sir. Nicely done. It’s not your fault that your image graces a book unworthy of your Chris Hemsworth-ness. I forgive you.

Does this book contribute to or help crush the romance stigma?
It contributes mightily.  

Other reading suggestions
For smart comedy, check out Tara Sivec’s Seduction and Snacks, and Isabel Jordan’s You Complicate Me.

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