First Grave on the Right

DUDE REVIEW

Title: First Grave on the Right
Author: Darynda Jones
Publication date: 02/01/2011
Kindle Unlimited: No
Cliffhanger: No

Ladies:

Ever wonder what men think of the romance novels you love so much? Do they agree with all of the stupid romance novel stigmas that exist out there? Ever felt like tying one to a chair and forcing him to read one of your favorite romances? Well, I did just that. (Without tying anyone to a chair, of course. The authorities frown upon that.)

The Design Dude here at Romance Rehab was a romance novel virgin. But he’s a pretty open-minded dude (and totally susceptible to a double-dog dare, as it turns out), and was willing (if not eager) to help out with this little experimental reading project. The goal? Convince readers in other genres that there’s more to romance than meets the eye and that it’s not just for women.   

A couple of side notes:

1) Yes, I realize that men read romance novels, too. But they only make up about 10% of the total romance readers out there. So, please don’t send me hate mail about this or I’ll be forced to leave a flaming bag of dog crap on your doorstep. We’re just having fun here. There’s no need to get technical. And while we’re on the subject of getting technical…

2) I’ll be starting The Design Dude out slow on this project. I didn’t want to throw him into a diabetic coma or anything by foisting a Nicholas Sparks book on him. That’d just be cruel. So, for a few of my selections, it could be argued they aren’t “technically” romance novels. But, the romantic elements are a big enough part of the story to give The Design Dude an idea of what he’s in for in the romance world, and to ease him into it gently, rather than tossing him into the deep end before he’s learned to swim, you know? All I’m saying is, please don’t argue technicalities with me or the above statement about flaming dog crap will apply.

Let’s have some fun, shall we?

Sincerely,

Jennifer

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When Jennifer first suggested the idea of a guy reviewing romance novels—as she eyed me with a scheming smile—I have to admit I was kinda skeptical. (Which is a nice way of saying I thought she was bat shit crazy) As usual though, she had solid, well thought out reasoning that was hard to argue with, so I eventually gave in and agreed. Plus, she dared me so I didn’t really have much choice. (I’m still not discounting the possibility she used a Jedi mind trick of some kind though.)

Luckily for me, Jennifer is well aware of my decades-long bromance with Stephen King so she wisely chose a paranormal romance for me to lose my romance genre virginity with. I figured having a few supernatural elements would help keep me grounded if things got a little too romance-y for me along the way.

It took me all of about two pages to realize I had nothing to worry about. Turns out exceptional writing can make up for lots of stuff that would normally make me cringe. And make no mistake about it, Darynda Jones is an exceptional writer. (Cue all the Darynda Jones fans rolling their eyes and rightfully shouting “Duh!!”) That said, there wasn’t nearly as much mushy romance-y stuff as I thought there'd be. Don’t get me wrong, there were a few minor annoyances here and there but we’ll get to those later. For now, let’s talk about all the stuff I loved about this book:

• I’m a huge fan of snark and it’s pretty clear Darynda Jones is one of my people. There were at least 10-12 lines from this book where I snort-laughed (not my most attractive quality) and thought “I’m using that.”
• One of the things I find most fascinating about Stephen King’s work is reading about what happens when normal, everyday people face extraordinary circumstances. Charley may not be ordinary but she damn sure felt authentic, relatable and engaging. A reader can’t ask for much more than that from a main character.
• The devil is in the details and I haven’t read many authors (in any genre) who nailed the details as well as Darynda (we’re on a first name basis now). The second paragraph of the entire book included this hilarious tidbit:
  
  “I shivered and kicked out, unwilling to acknowledge the summons, then tucked my leg into the thick folds of my Bugs Bunny comforter.”
  
  The Bugs Bunny comforter tells me more about Charley than pages and pages of bland description ever could.
• Secondary characters can often make or break a story and while Charley is all kinds of awesome, her uncle Bob, Garrett Swopes and Cookie are definitely in line for best supporting character nominations.
• Dialogue, dialogue, dialogue...Darynda is a master, nuff said.
• World building can be a challenge in supernatural storytelling but Darynda was able to slowly and casually weave the important details into the natural flow of the story. It’s a skill readers greatly appreciate because there’s nothing worse than putting a story on hold as an author slogs through page after page of detailed explanations or backstories.
• The sex scenes were hot. Not sure if you’ve heard but dudes like sex. Just sayin’.

As I mentioned earlier, there were a few things I found a bit annoying and one thing in particular that quite frankly, kinda pissed me off. None of them were enough to kill my overall enjoyment but they were enough to deduct a half star—in my dude opinion:

• The over-the-top descriptions of Reyes’ beauty and perfection got to be a bit much after awhile. The guy is easy on the eyes. I get it. Can we move on now? I just didn’t like how a strong, confident woman like Charley was constantly getting more googly eyed than a teenager at a Justin Bieber concert. It just didn’t seem to fit the character.
• The whole situation between Reyes and his sister didn’t ring true to me. I don’t want to give away any spoilers but I wasn’t buying that scenario. Maybe it’s just me. I dunno.
• My biggest complaint by far is Charley’s dad. He’s a fairly minor character but I really don’t like this guy, especially the way he’s characterized as such a good dad. I have two stepdaughters of my own. My wife and I were married when my youngest was four years old. If I would’ve done to her what Charley’s step mother did when she was the same age, I’m pretty sure I’d no longer be married. The fact that her dad never came to her defense is cowardly and inexcusable. Charley shouldn’t want to have anything to do with him much less treat him like he’s the Dad of the Year. This point isn’t up for debate.

Despite these issues, I am most definitely still basking in the afterglow of having lost my romance virginity to an exceptionally well written, fast paced, snark and sarcasm-filled joy of a read. I have no idea what Jennifer will choose for me next but if Darynda Jones is representative of the writing quality within romance, I might actually enjoy this double-dog dare.

​​Does this book contribute to or help crush the romance stigma?
I'm certainly no expert but this book definitely crushed some of my romance stereotypes and since it was recommended to me by Jennifer (who is most certainly an expert) I'm guessing she'd agree.   

Other reading suggestions
I know this is where Jennifer usually recommends other books within the romance genre but since

1. this is my first romance book, and
2. the whole point of this reading experiment is to encourage folks to break out of their genre comfort zones, I thought I’d recommend a couple books outside romance but with similar elements 

For a series with strong female characters, snarky humor and awesome writing try Sam Sisavath’s Purge of Babylon series (Jennifer will vouch for me on this). Another of my favorite authors has recently started a new series with a tough and capable FBI agent seeking to avenge her husband and protect her young son from a shadowy organization operating outside the law. I highly recommend The Silent Corner by Dean Koontz (Book 2 in the series The Whispering Room is coming soon).

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