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The Mechanic

6/8/2017

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CONTEMPORARY ROMANCE

Title:
The Mechanic

Author: Vanessa Waltz
Publication date: 08/04/16
Publisher: Amazon Digital Services
Kindle Unlimited: Yes
Cliffhanger: No
Rating: 1 out of 5
 
Amazon blurb
Olivia
Gage Carter is the poster boy for rude, rugged, and obnoxious. He’s the town’s mechanic. When he’s not giving me a hard time about my car, he’s mocking my city girl ways.
 
He's a small town roughneck with a dirty reputation and a mouth to match. I'm a city girl. We go together like champagne and whiskey.
​
​
People told me he was trouble. But that didn’t stop me from craving his filthy promises that make my blood pound for hours. Or having full body shivers whenever he says my name. 
 
This joy ride’s gone too far. Now we’re married—by accident—no less. The town’s most ineligible bachelor is my husband.
 
Oh, and I’m pregnant.

Gage
The last thing I need is a wife…
 
Especially a high-maintenance one like Olivia Stewart. I’ve got no patience for a demanding, feisty city girl who thinks she can walk into my business and order me around.
 
But now that I’ve tasted her, I can’t get her out of my mind. She may be a burr in my side but she’s as sweet as honey. When she’s not driving me crazy, she’s driving me wild.
 
One problem: Some puffed-up rich boy from San Francisco thinks she’s his, and he’ll make my life hell if I don’t give her up.
 
Good luck with that. I can’t be bought, and I’m not giving up my wife and baby.
 
He wants a fight? This means war…

​My Review
I picked this book up because it was free on Kindle Unlimited (I do love me some Kindle Unlimited) and because it’s about a blue collar guy who’s good with his hands (I do love me some blue collar guys who are good with their hands). Sadly, this one was rant-inspiring. Here it goes (takes a deep breath):
  • Gage is a complete snob. He assumes that everyone from a big city is a rich, entitled jerk and thinks it’s OK to sexually harass Olivia because she comes from the big city.
  • Olivia is a doormat who lets this douchecanoe of a mechanic sexually harass and mistreat her because he looks hot without his shirt on. I would’ve rather had my car towed to Siberia than deal with that crap, even if the dude was the Second Coming of Chris Hemsworth.
  • I understand that the Fifty Shades books opened up a whole new world of sexual possibilities in the world of romance novels. If a woman enjoys being dominated by a man in the bedroom, I have no problem with that. But I do think this is something the woman and her partner should discuss before hand. These things should not come up (Heh? Come up? See what I did there?) mid-coitus. And if they haven’t talked about it, and a man orders a woman to kneel and swallow, she should probably knee him in the groin, collect her dignity, and leave. But that’s my opinion. Obviously, the heroine didn’t share my opinion. This behavior turned her on.
  • The heroine finds out she’s pregnant four days after having sex with the hero. I don’t care what kind of magic sperm he’s packing, no pregnancy test anywhere on the planet can determine pregnancy four days after sex.     
  • Olivia’s ex and his mother are cartoonish in their villany. Their attempts to destroy the town were completely over-the-top and ridiculous. I half-expected them to tie Olivia to a train track at any moment while twirling their moustaches, well, villainously.   
  • This was listed as a romantic comedy on Amazon. This book was in no way funny. Unless you find cartoonish villains and a drunken reverend crapping himself in public funny. I didn’t.
  • I saw no behavior from Gage that would make me think he’d be a good father or husband. I probably wouldn’t even let him work on my car, frankly.
  • Secondary characters hint at the fact that Gage has “had it rough,” which is why he’s  a surly a-hole all the time. Was he an abused child, you ask? An orphaned foster care kid? Nope. His bitchy ex left him because she didn’t want to live in small town America. That’s it. Boo-effin’-hoo, Gage. Sorry, but that doesn’t entitle you to be a jerkwad to everyone.      
 
Long-story-short: After reading this book, I wanted to knee Gage in the groin and slap Olivia across the face and tell her to find some self-respect. 
     
Does this book contribute to or help crush the romance stigma?
This is the Charlie Sheen of books. No amount of rehab will help it. Save yourselves! It’s too late for me...
 
Other reading suggestions
For a hot story about a guy (a mechanic) who is really good with his hands and NOT a jerkoff, try Marie Meyer’s Live Out Loud. You can check out our review, along with the sample, here.

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