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Top 6 things I REFUSE to tolerate in romance novels

8/6/2018

18 Comments

 
Top 6 things I REFUSE to tolerate in romance novels
I used to be an incredibly open-minded reader. I’d read just about anything and not much bothered me. But as I’ve gotten older, I’m finding that I have way more “line in the sand” moments while reading now than I ever had in the past. And by “line in the sand”, I mean stuff that I just will not tolerate. There are a few things that’ll make me DNF a book so fast your head will spin. (And if I do somehow manage to finish the book, you can bet it won’t be getting a 5-star rating from yours truly) Listed in no particular order, those things are:
Dead heroes/heroines
Now, I’m not talking about vampires, so let’s not get all technical here. I’m talking about books that are marketed as romance and end with the death of the hero or heroine. There’s an unwritten rule in the romance world that true romance novels end with a HEA (happily ever after) ending, or a HFN (happy for now) ending. So, authors, if the hero or heroine dies at the end of your book, please don’t market your book as a romance. (I hate false advertising as much as I hate dead heroes and heroines) And if you do, don’t be surprised if I rip you a new one in my review.

Note (SPOILERS AHEAD): there is one notable exception to this rule, and that’s Emma Scott’s Full Tilt duet. I wasn’t able to finish book 1 in the series because I could see the ending coming a mile away and knew it would break my heart, but I went on to read the second book, All In, and ADORED it. But if you’re like me and can’t stand dead heroes in your romances, go ahead and skip book 1 and dive directly into All In, which ends in one of the best HEAs I’ve ever read. (Teddy is on my top 10 list of all-time great book boyfriends. He’s yummy. That is all.)

Child abuse on the page
If characters have been abused in the past, I can take it. (I don’t like it, but I can take it) But as soon as I start reading graphic scenes of child abuse, I’m out. I’m a mom. Child abuse just makes me sick and I don’t want to read about it in my romance novels.

One novel that did a great job of giving me enough detail to understand what had happened to a character without getting overly graphic was Carian Cole’s Tied. I knew just enough about what happened to the heroine to empathize with her and understand just how far she’d come by the end of the book, but not so much that it gave me nightmares. Unlike Lisa Gardner’s Say Goodbye, which I still have nightmares about to this day. Not that I’m bitter or anything. (I’m totally bitter, though)

Cheating
I’m not OK with heroes who cheat on heroines in romance. Once that happens, I want the heroine to nut-punch the hero and move on to eventually find a great, LOYAL guy to settle into HEA with. If anything other than that happens, I’m unhappy and totally prepared to write a ranty book review.
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Animal abuse/dead dogs
I won’t read about animal abuse for the same reason I won’t read about child abuse: it makes me sick. I have two rescue dogs of my own, and the thought of anyone hurting them makes me violently angry. I don’t need my romance novels to make me violently angry. And, I’m sorry, but there’s no good reason for a dog to die in ANY romance novel. If the dog in the movie version of The Mountain Between Us can survive a plane crash, hypothermia, starvation and wild animal attacks, any dog in any romance novel anywhere should be able to survive. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

Note (SPOILER ALERT): the only exception is dogs that die happily and peacefully in their sleep of old age, like in the Kristan Higgins classic Catch of the Day.

Graphic rape scenes on the page
Once again, if a heroine’s past tragically includes a rape, I’m OK with it. (Not happy, but OK) But when it’s graphically depicted on the page, I can’t and won’t read it. I don’t believe that readers need the gory details in that scenario. We all know how horrible rape is. We don’t need the play-by-play.

Incest
I’m not a fan of Flowers in the Attic, nor will I ever be OK with brothers and sisters having sex. Ew, ick, and gross. And that’s all I have to say about that.  

What about y’all? Where are your lines? Let us know! We’d love to discuss.

18 Comments
Kim
8/6/2018 11:41:17 am

The overwhelming belief that loosing your virginity is supposed to hurt. I find myself constantly angry at these writers. Apparently 10 % of "first times" tend to hurt but it like every romance virgin is of that 10%.

Writers who put their characters through trauma/past present that is so hard to deal with it has affected their life and then like flipping a switch make them okay again

Sexism. Some sexism is prevelant in period novels but my the heroes in the books I want to read HAVE to be feminist.

"Virgins blood" this concept is related to the first but sometimes even non virgins bleed, and yet every time the woman bleeds their male partners freek out about how it was their first time. Again this relates to the non-sex positive male partners.

Coercion or stalking on behalf of the male party after their love interest said "no" because its "cute" and will help them get the girl

Reply
Jennifer, Romance Rehab
8/6/2018 11:46:01 am

All great points, Kim! Thanks for commenting!

Reply
Laura Hull
8/6/2018 01:21:24 pm

Scary how much I agree with your list. Don't know when I've been so mad as when a recent romance read included the hero's dog getting fatally shot. The dog was trying to save a child from a bad guy, but it still hurt, especially when the so-called hero blew it off. His attitude was "that's what happens sometimes." Ugh.

One more thing I won't tolerate in romance novels is glaring fact gaps. There's no excuse - either do a little research or keep it vague so the details don't matter.

Reply
Jennifer, Romance Rehab
8/6/2018 02:26:05 pm

Thanks for commenting, Laura! I think I might've read the book you're talking about. If not, it was an identical scenario, and I was irritated about it for a LONG time. I'm with you on facts, too. I'd rather the details be kept vague so that nothing trips my bullshit meter. Once my bullshit meter is tripped, I just can't enjoy the read.

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Jeriann
8/6/2018 01:25:33 pm

I heartily agree & I'd add a couple things to this list:

I don't like reading rape scenes. I especially don't like it when authors downplay how many kinds encounters of dubious consent they blithely insert into a romance meet the legal definition of secual assault and are therefore legally rape. Put your hero or heroine through a sexual assault and call it what it is -- rape -- then see if you are so enamored of your plot point. I hate it when characters have a sexual assault in their past and authors are naive enough to have the character deny it was rape.

Another thing I hate is when serious emotional issues vanish without attention. Just as authors gloss over what constitutes a sexual assault, going through the trouble of crafting a character with a serious issue and leaving it untreated somehow is a disservice.

I'm old enough to remember when authors started making themselves write about safe sex. Writers of contemporary romance were nervous about making heroes put on condoms and making heroines insist on their partners wear one. I'm ok with writing about tough issues. Handle them correctly -- and provide a full resolution.

As an example of a short read. Alice Ward wrote about PTSD in story about a returning veteran -- Seal'd Heart. In this quick read, she took the hero from the depths of suicide to a real handling, including educating the heroine in dealing with his PTSD nightmares.so it can be done.

Reply
Jennifer, Romance Rehab
8/6/2018 02:27:33 pm

I'm with you, Jeriann. I wish more heroes and heroines went and got therapy for their serious issues. I hate the whole "love fixes everything" attitude some romances have. It's a lovely sentiment, but far from realistic.

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Pamela Clare
8/6/2018 04:28:11 pm

Heroes who are abusive. The word "hero" and abusive behavior are mutually exclusive in my mind. A hero should never deliberately do anything to harm the woman he cares about. I don't care what period of history we're in or whether it's present day.

Lack of consent. Come the hell on, folks. Only YES means yes. A hero who tries to trick, manipulate, or physically overpower a heroine into saying YES is a rapist, not a hero.

Infidelity.

Overly innocent and meek heroines. A heroine who never swears, has never made herself come, and doesn't know what a penis looks is boring. In a contemporary setting, it's absurd.

Sloppy research. The Internet is a real thing. It can teach you want you don't know. Authors should take care to be as accurate as possible. Everyone makes mistakes, but some are glaring. If they pull me out of the story, I probably won't finish it.

Reply
Jennifer, Romance Rehab
8/6/2018 05:50:35 pm

A million times yes!!! Well said. Thanks so much for commenting!

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Amy McBurnie
9/10/2018 11:18:02 pm

Poor research will turn me off an author immediately and I won't go back. If you want my money and time, then earn it by putting in the research necessary to make the story realistic. Unfortunately, I'm finding too many of the "military" romances now flooding the market fall into this category. If an author can't even get ranks and time in service correct, then everything else in the book becomes suspect.

Pamela Clare is one of the yardsticks by which I judge quality of research. She sets a very high bar, but that's what makes her books so good.

Reply
Jennifer, Romance Rehab
9/11/2018 09:04:38 am

That's a really good point, Amy! Anything that trips my bullshit meter (which, bad research usually does) can make me DNF a book. (And Pamela Clare is a goddess!!)

Caitlyn Lynch link
8/6/2018 06:07:57 pm

Minority characters who turn out to be the villain. That DOES NOT COUNT towards increasing minority representation. Quite the opposite. Also, openly racist or homophobic characters, or ones who use slurs.

TSTL heroines and alpha-hole heroes, together or separately.

Authors who clearly haven't done their research, especially in historicals. "Gotten" was not a word used by the English upper class in 1815.

Magical healing cock (or vagina). PTSD or panic attacks are not magically cured with sex.

Reply
Jennifer, Romance Rehab
8/6/2018 07:50:09 pm

That's all so true! Good points, Caitlyn!!

Reply
Theresa Cryer
8/6/2018 07:17:57 pm

I agree with exactly what you have said!! I would add that I cannot take it when some fact or circumstance is not resolved by the end of the story and there is not any hope that it will be resolved in a sequel!!

Reply
Jennifer, Romance Rehab
8/6/2018 07:48:09 pm

Ugh, yes! Loose ends suck!!

Reply
kj
8/6/2018 09:16:18 pm

Yes on rape stuff one book I read goes on my scared me for life list! I would also add portraying abusive relationships as romance.

Reply
Jennifer, Romance
8/7/2018 12:34:46 pm

I'm with you, KJ. I've definitely been scarred by books before. Thanks for commenting!!

Reply
Kathryn Romance rehab
8/10/2018 10:07:55 am

I would pick all of the 6 myself. HEA means HEA and no girl in her right mind takes back a cheater. Also ,where is dead hero a HEA book?

Reply
Jennifer, Romance Rehab
8/16/2018 07:43:48 am

Right? I don't get the dead hero/heroine thing at all. That is NOT romantic in any way shape or form. And neither is cheating!!

Reply



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