book recs, author services, general badassery
  • Blog
    • Free Romance Reads
    • Our Thoughts
    • 1-Click Wonders
    • Author on Authors
    • Chattin' with Authors
    • So You're New To...
  • Book Recs
  • Reviews
    • 5-Star Reads
    • Contemporary Romance
    • Historical Romance
    • New Adult Romance
    • Paranormal Romance
    • Romantic Comedy
    • Romantic Erotica
    • Romantic Suspense
    • Teen Young Adult
    • Hall of Shame
  • About
    • Contact
    • Review Policy
    • Guest Post Guidelines
    • Advertising on Romance Rehab
  • For Authors
    • Romance novel blurb help
    • Referral Program
    • Romance Remedy
    • Romance Author Services
    • Online Writer's Resources
    • Proofreading Test >
      • Proofreading Test Answers
  • Blog
    • Free Romance Reads
    • Our Thoughts
    • 1-Click Wonders
    • Author on Authors
    • Chattin' with Authors
    • So You're New To...
  • Book Recs
  • Reviews
    • 5-Star Reads
    • Contemporary Romance
    • Historical Romance
    • New Adult Romance
    • Paranormal Romance
    • Romantic Comedy
    • Romantic Erotica
    • Romantic Suspense
    • Teen Young Adult
    • Hall of Shame
  • About
    • Contact
    • Review Policy
    • Guest Post Guidelines
    • Advertising on Romance Rehab
  • For Authors
    • Romance novel blurb help
    • Referral Program
    • Romance Remedy
    • Romance Author Services
    • Online Writer's Resources
    • Proofreading Test >
      • Proofreading Test Answers
Picture

The 12 type of romance heroines I HATE

10/15/2018

2 Comments

 
The 12 type of romance heroines I HATE
Last week, I outed the romance heroes I wanted to nut-punch. This week, it’s the heroines’ turn. (Only, you know, without the nut-punching). So, without further ado, here are the heroines I pretty much never want to see again. Like, ever:

via GIPHY


​The TSTL heroine

This one is pretty self-explanatory. No too-stupid-to-live heroines are allowed in my 5-star romances. End of story.

via GIPHY


​The one with a list
If you’ve read romance for any length of time, you know what I’m talking about. This is the heroine who wrote a stupid list, usually when she was a kid or teenager, and insists on living her adult life by that list. The list can be the goals she wants to accomplish along with a timeline, or it can be traits that make up the perfect man. Either way, it’s stupid, which makes HER stupid, and I have no tolerance for that kind of crap in my romance novels.

via GIPHY


​Stubborn to a fault
This is the one who has a serial killer after her, but she stomps her little foot and insists she doesn’t need a bodyguard because NO ONE TELLS HER WHAT TO DO. Stubbornness can sometimes be an attribute, but a good heroine knows when to put her stubbornness aside and do the smart, reasonable thing.

via GIPHY


​The one with the crappy sex life
When a romance heroine has had a terrible sex life and insists that the problem must be her, that SHE must be bad at sex without ever suspecting that MAYBE—just maybe—she’s had crappy partners, I hate her. I mean, I REALLY hate her. Like, I hate her so much that 9 times out of 10, I’ll DNF her ass right there. That goes double for the heroine who can’t get pregnant and assumes she’s infertile without ever having a test done, because SURELY it can’t be that her horrible ex boyfriend/husband/whatever is shooting blanks. (And, come on, we ALL know the horrible ex boyfriend/husband/whatever is shooting blanks. That’s just...law in romance land. Only the hero is studly enough to impregnate the impregnable.)    

via GIPHY


​The Paragon
The heroine that is always sweet, positive, supportive, and good at everything she’s ever tried to do but is still super humble...yeah, I hate her, too. Real women have flaws. Paragons are boring.  

via GIPHY


​Little Miss "Oh, I'm so plain"
I want to throat-punch the heroine who insists that she’s plain and ordinary, or even ugly while every male in the story says she’s the most beautiful creature who ever lived. (*cough*Bella Swan*cough) This heroine will often react with shock or disbelief and argue when anyone tries to tell her that she’s desirable.

via GIPHY


​The one who mistakes "strong" with "bitchy"
There’s a big difference between a strong heroine and a bitchy one. The ones who cross the line irritate the crap out of me.

via GIPHY


The virgin desperate to lose her virginity
I’m not a huge fan of virgin heroines over the age of 25 unless there’s a VERY good reason for why they’re virgins. But I have even less tolerance for the heroine who has kept her virginity for years, only to be willing to all of a sudden toss it at the next willing penis she finds, simply because she’s ready to “get it over with.”

via GIPHY


The doormat
I think this one is self-explanatory, too. The heroine who lets the hero—or anyone else-—treat her like crap needs TO GO.

via GIPHY


The one who doesn't understand what "Plus Size" is
The heroine who insists she’s fat, only to admit later that she’s a size 8 or 10? Screw you, honey! Size 8 or 10 is NOT FAT! The 2018 average US women’s dress size is 16. Note, I said AVERAGE.

via GIPHY


The one who thinks stalking = love
I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again: stalking isn’t sexy. If he’s following you and spying on you, it’s not because he loves you. Get a restraining order. And a big dog. The end.

via GIPHY


The impossible beauty
Everything about her is perfection. No pimples, no stretch marks, no saggy skin anywhere, no hairy legs, no visible roots in her hair, no morning breath, no eyebrows that are long overdue for plucking...I’m sorry to ruin your fantasy, guys, but women this perfect don’t exist in nature. Beauty takes some effort. It doesn’t come as easily to ANYONE as it does to some romance novel heroines. I want these women out of my romance novels, frankly. They’re making the rest of us feel bad about ourselves.   

What about y’all? Any heroines you’d like to boot off the island? Let us know! We’d love to hear from you!
2 Comments
Laney Wylde link
1/1/2019 10:39:13 pm

Okay, this was the best thing ever. I also HATE all of these romance heroines!! Amazing post.

Reply
Sal
8/23/2021 05:35:33 pm

I hate the ones that are portrayed as good and sweet but are actually horrible people. They’re mostly selfish.

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    Romance Rehab newsletter sign up

    FOLLOW US 
    Reedsy Top Book Reviewer 2019

    RSS Feed

    Archives

    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017

Picture

BLOG
FREE Romance books
​Book Recommendations

Our Thoughts
1-Click Wonders
5-Star Reads
Authors on Authors
Chattin' with Authors
So You're New To...
What Not to Read
REVIEWS
​
Contemporary Romance
Historical Romance
New Adult Romance
Paranormal Romance
Romantic Comedy
Romantic Erotica
Romantic Suspense
Teen/Young Adult
ABOUT
Contact
Review Policy
Guest Post Guidelines
Advertising on
​Romance Rehab

​
FOR AUTHORS
Online Writer's Resources
Proofreading Test
ROMANCE AUTHOR SERVICES 
Romance novel blurb help
Romance Remedy program

Referral program

Romance author services
  • Book cover critique
  • Animated book covers and social media graphics
  • Beta reading
FREE Romance Rehab newsletter: ​Subscribe here
KnockinBooks LLC is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com.
​© 2020 KnockinBooks LLC