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Not Just Another Romance Novel by Lisa Suzanne

1/9/2019

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​ROMANTIC COMEDY
NEW ADULT ROMANCE


Publication date: 08/27/2015
Kindle Unlimited: Yes
Cliffhanger: I dunno
Hotness rating: I dunno...I didn’t make it to any sex scenes

Hello, Unpopular Opinion Crew, it is I, your Queen. I’m here to talk about this book which has plenty of 5-star ratings and lots of glowy reviews. I, of course, didn’t like it. Not. At. All.

Here’s what didn’t work for me:
Nudge-nudge-wink-wink anti-romance novel mentality
The heroine (whose name I can’t remember and don’t care to look up) is supposedly a romance novel fan, but doesn’t really act like one at all. She’s pretty quick to poke fun at the genre and laugh about all the silly tropes with her friends. I’m all for satire, but this came across as anti-romance in more than a couple of cases.

The trope
And here we have yet another “for the sake of science” romance experiment.

via GIPHY


But the real problem? The “science” of it was the most unscientific thing I’ve ever read in my life. Half the time I couldn’t tell if the heroine was approaching men because she was horny or because she wanted them to be part of her “experiment.” It was super weird. 

via GIPHY


​It’s not really that easy…
So, the heroine decides she’s going to date all the stereotypical romance novel hero types in the name of “science”. She’s going to date a rock star, a billionaire, a bad boy, a biker, her step brother, a sexy single dad...and the list goes on. And she wrote these types down like it was going to be so easy. I mean, sure, why not assume you can walk into the local grocery store and find a sexy billionaire? Happens to me every Tuesday. The fact that the heroine thought her plan was even remotely plausible made me question her intelligence. And I HATE stupid heroines, y’all.
​

via GIPHY


​She’s gonna do WHAT?
I’ve already been side-eyeing our intrepid heroine for a full chapter when she meets a sexy single dad at the grocery store and agrees to COME TO HIS HOUSE FOR DINNER. Public service message ladies: I don’t care how hot the guy is, DO NOT go to some random dude’s house for dinner. He could be a serial killer, a rapist, a John Mayer fan...the list of possible horrible consequences goes on and on. It was at this point, while she was making out with a random dude she’d just met, that I decided I kind of wanted random dude to toss her into his basement pit and make a hat out of her head. She’s clearly too stupid to live. Might as well kill her off in spectacular fashion, you know? 

via GIPHY


Sure...hot guys are everywhere
Outside of Hollywood, let’s face it: it’s not terribly easy to find guys who are heart-stoppingly gorgeous. And in real life, you can’t assume that every gorgeous guy you meet is going to be unattached and interested in you. Sad but true. But that’s not the case for our heroine! She finds gorgeous men everywhere! And they all want our lovely little Mary Sue Sunshine heroine, of course. Why, 2 hot men she’s just met actually fight over her on her first “outing for science!”

via GIPHY


I also have it on good authority that the heroine spends a big portion of the book banging a dude who isn’t the hero, by the way. I can’t confirm that, but it makes me glad I DNFd before I got there. I have no tolerance for that BS.  

So, long story short, this one just wasn’t for me. But based on the 5-star ratings and glowy reviews others have blessed it with, maybe you’d like it just fine. Who knows?
​

via GIPHY


Does this book contribute to or help crush the romance stigma?
It’s lousy with stigma. 

Other reading suggestions
It’s unrelated, but try The Virgin Romance Novelist. It’s lots of fun.

Since we're already being grumpy...

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What's wrong with the romance genre?​
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Romance tropes we never want to see again. Ever.​
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Why authors need to kill off stupid heroines​
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