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Types of people I will be auto-blocking on social media from now on

7/19/2021

3 Comments

 
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I try not to engage with toxic folks on social media. Really, I do. But sometimes I just can't help myself and fire off a response that inevitably doesn't do any good. And no matter how well-reasoned, polite, or funny my response is, it won't EVER do any good. Because the fact is that loud, wrong, and toxic people enjoy making others angry. So, from this point on, I will be auto-blocking THESE types of people (and I reserve the right to add to this list at ANY time):   

Book thieves

Anyone boo-hooing about how pirating books is the only way they can read because *insert excuse to justify stealing here* is getting blocked. You know why? Because if you can pirate books, that means you have a computer or smart phone of some sort. And if you have THAT, you can download the free Kindle app and have access to more free books than you could ever read in a lifetime. There are also about a million other sites where readers all over the world can access free books (including but not limited to libraries).

And to the woman who argued with me yesterday that my statement is false because not everyone has Kindle Unlimited (which is a different thing entirely and not AT ALL what I was actually talking about), I say...well, no, nevermind. I don't have anything to say to THAT woman because I already blocked her, per my new auto-block policy. So, ha! 

And for more info about why book thieves suck, check out THIS post about, uh, why book thieves suck.     

The "romance novels don't need a HEA" crowd

Yes, romance novels DO need a happily ever after ending--or at least a happy for now ending. It's the ONE rule of the genre. I didn't make it up. It's not my rule. So don't come crying to me that I'm "gatekeeping" and trying to keep authors out of the genre. As I've said MANY times before, there is a big difference between love stories and books that are romantic/have a romantic subplot and actual romance novels. I'm not going to re-state them all here, but check THIS out if you need more info. 

And for the people who always pop up and smugly ask, "But what about Romeo and Juliet, huh?" My only regret is that I can't block you twice. Romeo and Juliet is a TRAGEDY, for the love of Dolly Parton.    

The "romance sucks" folks

All the people who like to dunk on romance and think they're being oh so clever and witty, then cry, "But I was just joking! Why can't you take a joke?"...yeah, all those people are getting blocked. Regurgitating tired stereotypes to badmouth a genre that takes flack DAILY isn't funny. The romance stigma is a bunch of flaming horse crap--and so are the people who believe in it.   

The "self-published authors suck" crowd

I've just about stopped reading traditionally published books altogether. It's a long story as to why, but without self-published authors, I would've missed out on over 75% of my favorite books this year. Self-publishing is no joke--and the sooner literary snobs realize that, the sooner we can all start talking about some really great books.  

Misogynists

 I think this one speaks for itself. 

​And, pro tip for all the men out there: If a woman or group of women is saying that something is horribly misogynistic, avoid the urge to jump in and tell them, "Well, I didn't see it that way." Of course you didn't. It wasn't aimed at you. Try keeping an open mind about the issue. You'll never understand misogyny as well as someone who has experienced it first hand. 

Same goes for internalized misogyny. If you're a woman talking about how awful other women are, you're getting blocked.  

The "romance novels are unrealistic and dangerous" crew

First of all, since when is realism the bar by which we measure FICTION? Does anyone complain about how sci fi novels aren't realistic enough?  No. I wonder why that is? Could it be because romance is mostly written by women for women? *cough*misogyny*cough*

And for everyone arguing that romance novels give women unrealistic expectations, I think YOU should have higher expectations for yourself. We all deserve to fall in love with wonderful people and have happy endings in our lives. If you think we don't, well, I feel bad for you. And readers aren't stupid. We're capable of sorting fact from fiction, real life from fantasy.

Also, I watch a lot of Criminal Minds. Does that mean I'm in danger of becoming a serial killer? Nope. So why would it be dangerous for me to read lots of romance novels?  

Fandom menaces

Anyone in a fandom who tries to tell me how I should or should not enjoy media is getting blocked. I'm allowed to like whatever I like, no matter how problematic or messy YOU think it is. Live and let live. 

Anyone (but especially men) who argue about how great The Rise of Skywalker was

This one is "kind of" tongue-in-cheek...but not entirely. Look, the movie was a misogynistic dumpster fire that I wish I could nuke from orbit, and anyone talking about how "great" it was because they love the pew-pew is NOT going to get along with me, so the block is as much for me as it is for y'all. If you liked the movie, I'm happy for you. But don't try to convince me that it wasn't offensive to women (and anyone who appreciates a coherent plot and good storytelling). 

Those who cry "troll!" too quickly

Calling everyone who disagrees with you a "troll" is a good way to get blocked. Not everyone who disagrees with you is a troll. Some of them just don't agree with you--and that's OK. 

Name callers

Anyone in an online argument who stoops to petty name calling is getting blocked. Not because you offend me, but because you're unoriginal and boring. 

Scammy scammers

If you're a vanity publisher who claims you aren't a vainty publisher, but who charges authors to publish their work, you're a scammy scammer and you're getting blocked.  

Spammers

If you follow me, then immediately spam me with "buy my stuff" messages when I follow you back, I'm blocking you. Spamming is a dick move. 

Bossy McBossholes

If you're one of these "my way is the only way" bossholes who get preachy on social media, I'm blocking you. Example: The douche who said, sometime last week, that authors who sell their books cheaply are devaluing literature. He went on to say that even though he'd just told authors what to do, he hated it when authors told other authors what to do. Then he called me a troll for pointing out his hypocrisy. Yep. I blocked him. 

Mansplainers

Enough said, I think. All you "well, actually" folks know who you are. 

But that's just an off-the-top-of-my-head list. What about y'all? What types of people are YOU going to block? Let's discuss.

3 Comments
Jeanne Estridge link
7/19/2021 08:09:20 pm

Lol--you're on a roll! I can't think of anything to add to this list, but I snort-laughed reading it.

Reply
Jennifer, Romance Rehab
7/19/2021 08:36:06 pm

Well, in that case...my work is done. :) Thanks for commenting!

Reply
Arzu
7/20/2021 08:00:51 am

Completely agree with the whole misogyny and mansplainers points, especially the men from the Star Wars fandom. Seriously. If I had a euro for every time I heard some dude tell how an "actual brown woman should behave" or how a "disabled woman is supposed to act" I'd be on a rocket to the moon by now lol. Mansplainers who are also racists or ableists gets a block in my book. Like have some basic humanity, man.

The thing I've noticed is that people completely miss or willfully ignore on the recycled book piracy disk horse is the un-nuanced takes from people in the West. No one is condoning piracy, but what's not being tackled in the discussions is the systems within publishing companies and library boards that essentially gatekeep books from readers outside of western countries.

People don't understand or listen to global south readers when we say that libraries are rare and outdated in our countries, library apps are not available in countries outside of US/Canada/Aus/UK, the kindle ebooks that costs $4.99 USD in the US costs $10.99 USD in other countries, free public domains are not available in most countries. We pointed this out again to this one lady on twitter and she went on an even more ignorant spiel then went on a blocking spree instead of hearing what people had to say. Like instead of getting to the core of the problem like the systems at play, people attack global south readers for being poor and suggest ignorant sentiments like "just go to the library" when that isn't an option for many? Like why do that? Not even to people in rural America. We need solutions to make reading more accessible, not dunking on poor readers. Anyone who blames BIPOC readers in the global south or are just ignorant in general gets a block from me.

People also seem to miss that the ones pirating the books are not the poor people in the global south (lol we don't even have that kind of tech nor stable internet access everyone believes). In communications and media research, book pirating was most commonly committed by middle class people in the US. But people just want to blame the readers for reading it instead of those who are doing the pirating. Instead of getting to the root of the problem. It's just ridiculous how people and the publishing industry forget that there are readers in the global south, ya know?

I don't know anymore, I just hope as people become more aware, that they consider readers outside of the US or underprivileged people within the US, and actually take our nuances to account. As a disabled BIPOC in the global south, I'm just tired.

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